Throwback
by ChickenBurgers
Summary: Konohamaru is twelve. He should be dead, frankly, but instead he's stuck a decade in the past. And now all of a sudden, the people he looked up to are the people looking up to him. Time Travel.
1. Chapter 1: Sarutobi Konohamaru

_ChickenBurgers:_ Hello there. This is not the first story I have written, but it is the first one to see the eyes of the internet! I hope anyone who reads will enjoy.  
Some information for you! First, this is a Time Travel story. If you don't fancy the concept, you won't want to read it! Second, the central character is Sarutobi Konohamaru- the boy is underrated, I think, and I like underappreciated characters. So let us see how it all plays out.

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**Chapter One- Sarutobi Konohamaru**

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Every inch of his body screamed. Just lifting his head was a battle, and Konohamaru was ashamed to say he might lose it. (He had already lost the battle against that orange haired _freak_)

He was a shinobi, he told himself weakly, he was supposed to be strong. He was supposed to rise up even if it killed him, and fight, and win at all costs. Because a shinobi never gave up, a shinobi never failed, a shinobi never slowed down until he was dead.  
But then again, maybe he was. There was a war on, Sasuke-niichan had gone batshit nuts and some dead-but-maybe-not-so-much guy was trying to take over the world...for...why was he again? Peace? _Bullcrap_, his addled head managed to squeak out. Still, he certainly hoped he wasn't dead. Sakura-nee had chased that freak Kabuto off into the woods, Sai-san(he wasn't comfortable using anything less respectful with him quite yet) was trying to off that weird water guy, and... after that hole got punched in his gut, what had happened?

He couldn't remember. A flash of white, maybe? A roar? Something like Naruto-niichan might make when he was _really _angry, only beast-like and tearing the world apart with its force.

Where was he?

Konohamaru forced his eyes open, and found the eaves of a faraway rooftop. One that was casting a shadow over his spread eagled form.

He tried to count his injuries without moving, just in case doing so would make him scream like a little girl.  
One- his shoulder was definitely knocked out of its socket. Gross.  
Two- It wasn't anything that ought to kill him anymore, but there was definitely a nasty, healed up gash in his stomach.  
Three- the world spun without him moving, so he probably had a concussion.  
Four- he could feel several bones in his right hand and wrist trying to break out of his skin.  
Five- contusions and lacerations all up and down his arms and legs. Mostly superficial, some that were deep enough to scar. Those were probably from that huge freak, Juugo.

Now that all that was done, he had to wonder why he was under a roof- well, in an alleyway, probably. He turned his head. Yep, it was an alley. There was a trash can right over there. And another building.

He let out a long sigh.

And then he sat up, and bit back a loud scream. His mind was clearing up a little, coming back to its usual level of analytical ability- and contrary to the silly bravado he put up in order to have more fun, he did have quite a bit. After all, he was the Sandaime's grandson, a two-years-early graduate of the Academy. That wasn't _nothing_, even if it wasn't Kakashi or Itachi level.

Forget that though, he decided, everything hurt like a son of a sea cook. But he needed to figure out why he wasn't on that rocky old hillside anymore. And so despite the screaming of his bones and joints and _oh god his shoulder was so very dislocated_ he stood up and walked to the edge of the alleyway to take a closer look at what was outside.

It was bone chilling that he knew the shop across the street.

Bone chilling, because it was a sushi restaurant he went to with Moegi and Udon after training all the time, where he bought extra tuna rolls to take home for his mother, because she loved them, and where the owner's daughter scolded him for being a lousy tipper all the time. That place should be nothing but rubble after what Pein had put Konoha through a few months ago. Why was it standing up now, as if nothing had ever happened, the sign above the door so brightly painted as if it had only just been put up? Even the old lady from the laundromat Naruto-niichan went to was there drinking a saucer of sake, and she had died two years ago.

So something was obviously off.

Konohamaru loosened his scarf and slid down the stone wall of the building behind him. He needed to think. The first obvious conclusion would be that he was in a genjutsu. But if he had been dying- and he was almost certain that having a hole punched through your stomach caused symptoms like death- there would be no point in healing him up just to do that, would there? And he didn't know any classified information either, that was for sure.

"So, genjutsu's out." he decided quietly, "But then what's going on? That hag from the laundromat is drinking her heart out and she's supposed to be six feet under, the Hatsumari Sushi Bar is standing upright as if nothing ever happened to it, and I'm pretty sure that isn't supposed to happen on a regular basis..."

The only idea that popped into the genin's mind was crazy, utter lunacy, and made him simply think he had been playing too many video games, reading too much of Udon's manga, or something of that sort, but it was the only conclusion he could come to. He slipped off his Shinobi Army headband and ran his thumb over the cold metal. It was solid feeling, sort of a rock he could stand on.

_Naruto-niichan would totally freak out in a situation like this_. He thought, _Even Sakura-neechan would freak out. But somehow I just feel like a blank chalkboard._

Maybe it was shock, he concluded. He'd gone through a spell a bit similar to this after his first kill, anyway, and that was what it had turned out to be, so maybe he should just move on from that.

Time travel or not, he couldn't stay in the alley, and if it _was_ time travel after all, he couldn't very well go out looking like he did. He was a stereotypical Sarutobi clansman- the wild, upturned hair, lazy looking dark eyes. And he was dressed up with weapons and ninja gear head to toe. "well, only one thing to do about the hair." he said.

He shuffled around with his good arm and found a kunai. And his stomach churned in anxiety.

"Man, I don't wanna do this at all, I love my hair." he whined feebly.

But he lifted both arms up painfully and began to tear through tuft after tuft anyway, until all that was left was straight falling, unevenly short-cut black hair, making him look like a rowdy middle-schooler from some big city. He could see it, a little distorted, in the reflection of his forehead protector. He made a disgusted noise -it didn't suit him, not a bit!- and unwound his scarf.

Then he tossed out his weapons pouches- couldn't be caught with those, their serial numbers didn't even _exist _yet- and slowly peeled off his jacket to the white tee shirt underneath.

He looked terribly shabby, he decided, staring in the reflection of his headband again. Like he'd had a nasty fall, or been mugged, or gotten into a fight or some such.

"I should go to the hospital." he sighed.

Wondering vaguely what had happened to Naruto and Sakura and the rest, and with a deep seated panic finally beginning to set in, Konohamaru finally discarded his forehead protector in the trash can and stalked out into the sun bathed streets, trying to ignore the astonished, worried, or appalled looks of the people around him, and the screaming pain of his injuries.

78()78()78()78()

The hospital was not mostly rubble and bent wiring and crushed beds when he arrived. It was pristine and white and huge and beautiful. He had stared at his feet the whole way there, trying not to vomit from the combination of pain and on-setting panic.

_What the hell is going on what the hell is happening what the hell is going on?_ His mind chanted at him. He responded to himself- going crazy now, no doubt- that he didn't have a damn clue, and would he please shut up, because he needed medical attention.

The different thing about this Konoha General Hospital, he decided as he walked in, was that there was no Tsunade-baa, no Sakura-neechan, no Shizune-san or even Ino-neechan on staff here. He didn't know any of these nurses or doctors or medic ninja running around, not even the receptionist at the desk, scribbling away at some sort of data entry.

He still wanted to vomit when he came up and spoke to her in the nearly empty emergency room.

"Uh, h-hi."

The greeting was clumsy and not nearly polite enough for a stranger. He scolded himself mentally, and his dislocated shoulder throbbed. The receptionist nurse took a look at him, and the tears and bloodstains on his clothes. "Oh, my." she stated in light concern, "What happened to you, young fella?"

"I, uh..."

_Shit!_ He screamed in his mind, _why didn't I think about that on the way over? Way to go, Sarutobi. You dumbass!_

"I...fell out of a tree!" he blurted after an awkward moment of silence, "And...well...yeah, that's what happened."

"No parent with you?" asked the nurse, as if he should have stopped at home to fetch his mother before coming to the hospital- well, he guessed a civilian kid would want the security of a parent first. But shinobi instinct was for physical healing, _then_ emotional comfort. It just went in that order.

"I...I don't have any." he lied outrageously. Of course he had parents! His mother was a civilian housewife and his father worked in decoding. "It's just...me."

_Wait, hospital visits are crazy expensive_. He thought suddenly, _that's if you see a civilian doctor, at least, shinobi medics are cheaper because they're on military grade salary, but...anyway, crap..._

A look of pity and compassion crossed over the nurse's face as she gave him a once or twice over. "I see, dear. Well, let me get your name quickly, and sit down. We aren't busy so I can get you with a doctor in two shakes of a lamb's tail."

"K-Kaaa..." _I can't use my real name. Dammit, when did I stop thinking ahead and start acting so much like Naruto-niichan?_ "Kazuya!" he finally said. It was actually the name of his neighbor's dog in the future.

"Any surname?" asked the nurse, scribbling on a sign in form.

"Uh, Katsuragi." Katsuragi sounded similar enough to 'Kazuya'. It would be easy to remember, at least.

He still felt like he needed to throw up.

The nurse wrote it down without question and directed him to a seat. He slid into the plastic chair gratefully and only just realizing how tired standing around had been making him. _Ah, that's right!_ He exclaimed to himself, and quietly he looked around. There were some vending machines in a corner with a clock above them- it was 3:45 pm, but that didn't matter right now.

"Paging Doctor Fujita, patient with multiple lacerations, and head trauma, possible broken shoulder." The nurse called through an intercom.

'Kazuya' looked behind her desk. _Yes!_ There was a calendar. The month of March, with fourteen days crossed off. The year was... No, that couldn't possibly be, not for real! He insisted, but he knew he had known all along. But to have gone so far back, even Naruto-niichan was only a little kid right now, wherever he was! Which meant this timeline's Konohamaru was only a baby. A year or two old, maybe. And here his future self was waiting in an emergency room for a Doctor Fujita to come and take care of him.

Konohamaru didn't want to vomit anymore. He wanted to cry. He wanted to lay down on the row of plastic yellow chairs and sob. Because what was he supposed to do _now_, he thought. What could a twelve year old boy do -even a ninja- to get back to where he belonged? And even then, it was either here, in this waiting room, or bleeding out on a hillside while a war raged on around him and all his friends wondered where he was.

The double doors leading to the examination rooms swung open, and a civilian doctor walked out of them with a clipboard. He looked neither cold nor caring, was tall and aside from the green rimmed glasses, the man Konohamaru assumed to be Doctor Fujita wasn't anything interesting.

"Katsuragi-kun?" he asked politely.

Konohamaru hadn't forgotten about his chosen alias, despite the horrifying realization that he was a good eleven or twelve years before he should be. He raised his hand and looked up.

"You're in nasty shape alright," said Dr. Fujita, "Please come with me, and we'll get you patched up."

They walked down a long hall speckled with pretty nurses, busy doctors and patients of all sorts. Konohamaru saw a boy half his age with a broken foot and tears streaming down his face, and an old man with a nasty cut on his hand waiting to be stitched closed. There was also a young, expecting mother in for a sonogram. Dr. Fujita nudged him into a room with his clipboard. There was a young and eager looking nurse in there, with short brown hair and sparkly, schoolgirl grade green eyes. _Wow, she's eager._

"Okada-san, this is Katsuragi Kazuya-kun. You'll be helping me with him."

"Understood, Dr. Fujita!" Nurse Okada proclaimed with a salute. Konohamaru stared at her. If Sakura-neechan had been a civilian, maybe she would have ended up like this.

He was glad she'd been a kunoichi instead.

"Please take his weight," Fujita handed her his clipboard, "And height while I go and fetch some things. And record any injuries Yamasaki-san missed at reception."

He strode briskly out of the room, and Okada turned to Konohamaru with a bright smile. It was blindingly _civilian_ in nature. He was so very unused to things like that after only a few months on the war-front. "Katsuragi-kun, wasn't it? I'm Okada Akemi. Let's record your injuries first, so you can have a moment to sit."

Konohamaru gained a little bit of appreciation for her. She had taken into consideration that he wouldn't want to stand up for long right now. He sat on the examination table obediently and counted things off.

"I think there are some broken bones in my hand." he said, "And my shoulders definitely out of its socket."

"Alright."

"I've got some cuts and scrapes, but the worst is on my stomach from landing on a broken branch." _that sounds believable enough._

Okada Akemi poked at the area around the large tear in his shirt, and a genuine concern for him dulled her eyes. "It's already healing over. I wonder how long you waited to come here?"

"I...kind of passed out... My head, I think there's a concussion." Konohamaru provided for her, "Are there any bruises?"

Akemi nodded vigorously, "Like big purple flowers."

She scribbled some more. "Is that all?"

"I'm pretty sure it is, I think I would have noticed anything else."

"Let's get your height and weight then, step on over."

Konohamaru stepped onto the weight scale. Akemi scribbled a number. He stood straight as a rail under the ruler on the wall and she scribbled another.

"...How old are you, Katsuragi-kun?" Akemi asked as he sat back down.

"I'm twelve." he replied, "I'm kind of short. Don't worry, I already know."

Akemi nodded. "I'm sure you'll shoot up in no time." she assured, as if she thought he needed it.

He didn't feel bad about being short at all, really.

Really!

Dr. Fujita walked back in rolling a trolley with various medical instruments and sterile gloves on his hands. Akemi stood at excited attention, eager to please. Konohamaru wondered if she had just started recently, and was trying to make a good impression. She was nice, at least.

Before he realized what was happening, Dr. Fujita was shining a small flashlight in his face. Once he got over the glare, he realized that his pupils were about to be properly checked. He tried to follow the light properly and his eyes wobbled.

"Your pupils are dilated." was the Doctor's short announcement, "You've got a concussion. And...we need to pop that shoulder back into place."

Konohamaru wanted to grimace, and he did. He'd seen Ino-neechan pop a dislocated shoulder back into place on Kiba-niichan once. It had looked like it hurt, probably almost more than a broken bone did.

He took a deep breath, clenched his teeth- like a _man_- and nodded.

Dr. Fujita lifted, pushed, and twisted. There was a brief moment where the pain was bursting and intense, then his arm was feeling normal and simply pulsing dully with ache.

"Doctor, he also has several broken bones in his hand, and a severe laceration on his stomach that should have stitches done." Akemi piped up helpfully, looking apologetically at the twelve year old about the stitches part. He smiled forgivingly. Stitches were something he could deal with, at least. You got anesthesia for those.

"Alright then." said the doctor, "let's get to it, and have you out of here as soon as we can.

The clock on the exam room wall read a stark 4:50 when Akemi walked into the room with a plain looking gray shirt for him. "Here, fresh from the laundry." she smiled. Doctor Fujita glanced at her briefly from his clipboard and Konohamaru yanked the shirt over his head. He looked with a bit of a pleased smile at the glaringly neon green cast he'd been fitted with. It was so bright, he figured he could use it like a flashlight in dark places. Made him a little more cheerful about his broken hand and the ten stitches on his stomach.

"Thanks, Akemi-oneechan." he said, "if I fall out of a tree again, I'll come see you and the doc for sure, you've been great to me."

"Oh, don't worry about it!" Akemi exclaimed, seemingly flattered by the 'oneechan'. She ruffled his clumsily cut hair and smiled rather winningly. "But I'd rather you not go falling out of any more trees, Kazuya-kun."

"True." added Dr. Fujita, "If you come again, why not just to visit, instead?"

"Yeah, of course I-" a realization came to mind. "Uh, what about the bill?" he asked suddenly, "I don't have any money, I just realized."

Dr. Fujita smiled. "I specialize in pro-bono work."

Akemi put on a proud smile and Konohamaru filled with gratefulness. "I'm definitely treating you to some noodles one day, doc! It's a promise, a promise."

Dr. Fujita smiled, and Akemi beamed, even though Konohamaru hadn't included her in the invitation. (But he'd probably let her tag along when the time came.)

78()78()78()78()

Despite the temporary comfort and bubbling happiness being fixed up by Akemi and Dr. Fujita had brought him, when ten o' clock came, the streets were pitch dark and Konohamaru was scared again. He was great at camping out on a moments notice, even with very little on hand to keep him warm, but even so, could he do that forever, or until he got back to the right place in time, or whatever? Eventually he would need a proper place to stay, and some kind of cash flow. Even a genin salary was enough to live off of, he'd found out from Naruto-niichan, especially if you budgeted smart and ate lots of instant foods like mac n' cheese or ramen or canned ravioli. But Konohamaru wasn't too sure about enrolling in the Academy at age twelve and working up from there.

He supposed he could go into physical labor. Construction maybe, or shipping merchant's goods. Well, he was good at academics enough too that he could be a home tutor for some rich parent's elementary age kid, but he didn't want to sit still all day.

"Screw that," he whined, "I want to see mom..." _Like that can happen..._

_But it's still true. I want to go back to where I can see Sakura-neechan and Ino-neechan and Naruto-niichan and everyone, and throw a million kunai at freaky black and white clones and get holes punched in my stomach because I'm a Big Damn Hero and bleed out on hillsides and die in a way I can be proud of. _

His stomach gurgled with hunger. He hadn't eaten since morning in the time he'd come from. So theoretically...never? Now he was confused. And even more hungry than before.

"I need to get my hands on some ryo and find a convenience store." he sighed, "Yeah, a canned coffee and some melon bread, that would be nice."

He passed an alleyway slowly, and realized with a jolt it was the same one he had woken up in that afternoon. He stared into it silently, thinking of the hitai ate and gear he'd left there to rot. Usually alley garbage only got picked up every two or three weeks. It cumulated kind of slowly, actually.

….one of those trash cans was rattling, he decided. It definitely was, because he could hear it, and his shinobi night vision could see it.

Curiosity got the better of him and he stalked over to see what was going on.

His stomach dropped out -the same way it did when he jumped from a large height- when he saw the tiny, too-skinny kid riffling through his stuff, looking for valuables. Shaggy, wild blonde hair, almost-glowing blue eyes, it was definitely his Naruto-niichan.

His "big brother" was in front of him, and he was five years old.

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_ChickenBurgers:_ I do hope you enjoyed. I'd like to thank my lovely DA friend _eatspeaches_ for heartlessly tearing apart all my spelling or grammar mistakes, and then fixing them. Despite her late inactivity as an author she is still a good editor.  
This story is still worming around in my head, so hopefully chapters will be popping up quickly enough as I get them finished for a bit. If you happened to enjoy it or have some advice for me, please drop a review. I'd love to hear anything you have to say.


	2. Chapter 2: Orange Juice

A/N: To begin, I'd like to thank _Circle of Phoenix _for the review! Feedback makes me happy.  
This chapter explores, for the most part, the beginning of Naruto and "Kazuya's" relationship. I have to say, the start of the story is likely to move a bit slow, so I hope all twenty three of you who read through the first chapter will bear with that for the next one or two. Thank you, and please enjoy!

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**Chapter Two- Orange Juice**

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Konohamaru and the tiny version of Naruto-niichan engaged in a short stare down.

Naruto-niichan had a pretty good hold on one of his kunai, though the way he was gripping it was all wrong, and he was looking up at Konohamaru with a readiness to hit and run at the smallest sign of trouble. Konohamaru didn't know entirely what his brother figure's life had been like as a child, but he suddenly got the impression that the blonde had been in danger far more often than he confessed to.

"...Hi there." he offered, waving with his cast hand.

Naruto took a look at the cast, appearing to feel a little less on edge in the realization that his new company was injured.

"Hi." he returned. His voice was sharp like a knife and almost angry. He wanted Konohamaru to go away.

"What's your name?" the genin pressed, trying to sound as if he wasn't asking a question he already knew the answer to. _Actually, maybe I should just leave. What am I even doing?_

"Uzumaki Naruto." replied Naruto. He was still wary, but he dropped the kunai and picked up the scarf instead. _Wise choice, he's more likely to be able to sell it. Nobody's going to buy a kunai with a 'fake' serial number from a five year old kid._

Konohamaru crept into the shelter of the alley and sat against the wall just as he had earlier in the day. "Why are you out here alone in the middle of the night then, Naruto? Where's your mommy and daddy?"

"Don't have any." Naruto replied, peeking up out of the trash can to get a good look at him.

"Really? Me neither."

Naruto cocked his head to the side, as if to ask 'really? I thought it was just me!' Konohamaru found it sort of cute, in a way, but then he remembered that until a few hours ago, he hadn't even come up to this person's shoulder, and he was sent reeling all over again. _Usually, it was Naruto-niichan calling me 'cute' for the way I use an overhanded grip on my kunai...how is that cute, anyway? Older brothers are weird._

"So who're you?" Naruto asked plainly after a moment.

"Katsuragi Kazuya." he replied easily. It was only the second time he had introduced himself with the alias, but it felt natural already, so much so that it was disturbing him.

"Ka-zu-ya." Naruto sounded it out experimentally.

"Very good."

Naruto climbed deftly out of the trash can, still holding the scarf, and squatted in front of Konohamaru. "Kazuya's a cool sounding name." he said in admiration. Konohamaru guessed it would. If he was right, Kazuya could be written with the kazu for one and the ya for to be, making it something like peaceful one, or the ya could be changed to the character for arrow or dart(Well, he was pretty sure it could be written a lot of ways...). It sounded a lot cooler than a word that simply meant _fishcake_.

"Thanks." Konohamaru replied honestly.

Promptly, Konohamaru's stomach growled. He flushed in humiliation, but he admitted to himself that he was rather starving and whether he liked it or not, this was his body's way of reminding him that he needed to eat. Naruto just looked at him, cocked his head, and smiled.

"At my house, I have food." he said proudly, "And the angry occhan that were outside before are probably gone now. Do you wanna come with me?"

_Angry occhan?_ Konohamaru felt a flash of worry, but he nodded anyway. "Sure. I can sleep on your couch, or something. I mean, I got no place else to go." That part was true, at least. He didn't have any place to stay, and he knew how comfortable Naruto-niichan's blue sofa was already, even if it was lumpy and old.

The chibi Naruto-niichan stood and wrapped the scarf around his neck several times. He gave an ears wide grin before scampering off, Konohamaru hurrying to follow and thinking _with how silly he looks in that thing, I wonder how stupid I looked in it._

The back roads of Konoha were always poorly lit, and one would think dangerous, but to the two children racing through them at top speed, filled with the elation and hopes of a good night's sleep and an imminent meal, whether they did in fact contain real danger was irrelevant. And besides which, they really weren't particularly dangerous streets, unless you looked incredibly rich, and neither of the boys did.

The ratty apartment complex on the corner of 63rd and Akaneboshi was the same as always. Peeling paint on vaguely green stone, cracking roof tiles, dirty glass windows. Despite the dank and disgusting appearance, Konohamaru loved the entire complex. He'd spent countless afternoons at Naruto-niichan's eating instant ramen and trying to get him hooked on canned coffee, listening to radio shows and reading manga and having shouting matches with the foulmouthed old man who lived across the hall.

Tonight, there were three or four middle aged men with bats and boards waiting outside the front entrance. _The angry occhan, I bet._ The beat up genin though worriedly. He had an instinctual knowledge of why they were there, too. He didn't like it, not one little bit.

"They're still here!" Naruto whined quietly.

"Shush," Konohamaru said, mindlessly hoisting the skinny child onto his shoulders, "Naruto-ni...Naruto-chan, where's your room at? We'll go in through the window."

Naruto squirmed around in his new seat. "It's on the top floor on the other end...how are we gonna get in there, Kazuya-oniichan?"

Konohamaru felt amusement as he circled around back that they had already resorted to such casual rapport between one another. Naruto had only known him for a few minutes, and as far as the child knew, Kazuya had only known him the same amount of time.

They reached the back of the building, and Konohamaru caught sight of the familiar window to Naruto's bedroom two floors up. "I'll show you how to get there!" he exclaimed as quietly as he could. Sending a spike of chakra through the muscles in his legs, the genin rocketed up into the air and stuck to the wall next to the closed window.

Naruto, on his shoulders still, covered his mouth to hide a shriek of surprise. "Oniichan, you're a ninja?" he hissed.

"Nope." a bold faced lie, "But I've learned a few tricks."

"Teach me too!"

"Sure, but help me get the window open first. And then we have to eat."

"Okay!"

With some prying and crying and splinters, the window slid upwards. Naruto crawled in first and landed on his cruddy, lumpy mattress. Konohamaru came in after him and took a look around the room. Minus the neat freak sort of cleanliness it had gained as his brother and mentor had gotten older and wiser, it was just about the same.

"It's a crap heap, right?" Naruto said proudly, "But it's home."

"It's a total crap heap." Konohamaru agreed fondly.

They stumbled their way through the mess and into the kitchen in the dark, where Naruto- boosted up by Konohamaru of course- turned on a small light above the stove that the men outside probably wouldn't notice. "You can eat whatever ya want since you helped me get home." Naruto said eagerly, pointing to the cabinets and fridge, and seeming very eager to have him there. Konohamaru opened the oldish, off white refrigerator and pulled out some not-expired orange juice and what seemed to be a convenience store bento. When he peeled off the lid there were onigiri with umeboshi, chopped vegetables and some hamburger meat inside.

"Say Naruto," he mentioned, beginning to eat with his hands for lack of chopsticks, "Doesn't anyone come around to check on you or anything? Like, take care of you?" It was a valid enough question. Naruto had said often enough that when he was a kid, Iruka-sensei had taken care of him a lot; for instance if he grew ill or got injured, or even ran out of grocery money. But he had never mentioned how far back that was happening.

Naruto grabbed the orange juice and took a sip, then bit out of one of the onigiri. "Nuh-uh, not really. Not unless the ojiji comes." he said, "Why?"

_Ojiji must mean my ojiji._ "Just you're still awful tiny. How old are you, five or six?"

Naruto held up five fingers. "Six in October." he confirmed.

Konohamaru scooped up some squash and carrot and forced some into the younger boy's mouth. Naruto grimaced foully but swallowed them up obediently when he received a reprimanding look. Konohamaru ate the rest. "I see." _So that means Iruka-sensei isn't around to look out for him yet; I guess he didn't start really taking care of him until he got into the Academy._

The genin shoveled down two onigiri and half of the meat, and shoved the rest of the food at his tiny host. "Eat all of it," he said commandingly, "Or you'll _stay_ tiny."

After hearing that, Naruto ate obediently. Though he made a face every time he bit into the vegetables and absolutely grimaced when he got to the umeboshi. It was fun to watch, Konohamaru decided as he gulped at the orange juice.

Finally, Naruto finished his food and looked up at him abruptly. "Say, Kazuya-oniichan!" he chirped, "Why don't you just _stay_ here? You know, all the time or something?"

Konohamaru took another gulp of orange juice. _Well I was thinking about that, but...I still dunno..._

"You could be like, my dad, or something." the blonde added on with excitement. This time Konohamaru choked on his orange juice.

"Ack! I- I'm way too young to be your dad, Naruto-chan." he corrected through his mad coughing.

Naruto's face fell. "Does...does that mean you don't want to stay?" he wailed immediately.

"Quiet down!" Konohamaru hissed. Naruto looked apologetic, but still unhappy, and sat back in his chair.

"I could be like your big brother or something." he corrected.

A few seconds later, Naruto, Konohamaru, and orange juice were all over the floor. Naruto was squealing out some sort of excited babble, while Konohamaru was trying to root around for something to clean up the mess and pry the five year old off of him at the same time. The orange juice just seeped across the kitchen tiles smugly.

78()78()78()78()

The sunlight glared through the window above the couch menacingly at around ten a.m., forcing Konohamaru's eyes open. He sat up feeling poorly slept. For one, he had been setting the alarm clock for every hour all night, to make sure he actually woke up -a precaution because of his concussion- and Naruto-nii... Naruto-chan didn't seem to have any extra pillows or blankets, so he had gone without. Despite the soft lumpiness of the sofa, his respite hadn't done him much more good than sleeping between watch shifts during the war had.

It was strange that he was thinking of the war as something 'behind' him already.

When he crept into Naruto...chan's room quietly, he found the young boy still curled into a ball under the stale smelling comforter. He was breathing peacefully, though he let out an occasional snort that sounded suspiciously like half a snore. _I wonder if that's from the dirty bedding. Maybe laundry should be on the to-do list for today._

Konohamaru decided to let him a sleep a while and check the apartment's condition out in the meantime. If he really was going to stay here and take care of Naruto like he had promised- the word _promise_ had never been in there but it had been implicated and that was enough- then he needed to get his bearings. He might not be able to fix the walls or the leak in the bathroom sink that was _always there no matter what_, but he could keep the place clean and get healthy food in the fridge.

He started by padding around the bedroom and picking up piles of discarded drawing paper and picture books. He shelved the books and organized the paper -blank paper went on the small writing desk, drawn-on paper in the desk drawer to be dealt with later. He picked up the dirty clothes and piled and folded them in the corner neatly to be taken to laundry when he had a chance, and some change to spend on it. The bedroom was less of a disaster area after that, so he moved through the living room, picking up various trash and junk and discarding them in a trash can on his way to the kitchen to check the stock of food.

He already knew what was in the refrigerator. _Some expired milk and katsudon that's at least three weeks old, a cup of leftover instant ramen, half a dozen eggs, and some raw miso._ He thought, _I can at least make a some breakfast with the eggs, but the milk is no good and Naruto knocked all the orange juice out of the bottle last night._

The cabinet was full of junk foods, he discovered. Bags of cheap chips, lots of instant ramen, some microwavable pasta. That would be alright for the time being, and with two of them in the house, it ought to last a couple of days.

"I really need to get a job soon." he sighed, "so we can get groceries. He's been getting 'em on his own until now, so he probably gets a stipend from ojiji or something, but that won't be enough for us to eat right..."

He looked at the sink idly. There weren't many dirty dishes, but the sink itself was so grimy that it frightened him. It was as if the mold and scum could grow into a summon beast any moment and start rampaging around the apartment complex, destroying everything in sight...and leaving a trail of disgustingness behind.

He went to look for some cleaner.

Uzumaki Naruto, age five, awoke to the sound of running water and low swearing. His nose was also filled with the smell of something soapy and lemony, and his curiosity piqued.

Last night something good had happened. Even though some scary old men had been outside his house to try and hurt him (that happened sometimes), he had found a nice _oniichan_ while he was out looking for a place to sleep or some dinner or something valuable, and that oniichan had taken him home and promised to protect him. And it definitely hadn't been a dream, because if it was, Naruto would be sleeping somewhere outside and not in his bed, which smelled vaguely damp and funky.

He rolled onto the floor -it was clean!- and scampered helter-skelter into the kitchen to find out why the water was running and the apartment smelled funny. "Investigate" was his first instinct when he woke up and something was out of place, like a clean bedroom. Or a broken lock and doorknob on his entryway -that one hadn't ended nicely, but he hoped this one would...why would someone angry clean his house for him?

He skidded to a halt on the kitchen tile and found Kazuya-oniichan, his new 'brother', scrubbing away at the sink with vigor. The rag he was using was already black with grime, but the green tint of the sink was visible again. ...Actually, Naruto had forgotten altogether that the sink was green, it had been so long since he had seen it without the scum.

"Wow!" he exclaimed in wonder, "You cleaned it all up!"

Konohamaru stopped briefly in his frustrated chore when he heard the excitable Naruto chime in and scamper across the kitchen floor to cling to his side. "G'morning Naruto-chan." he said plainly, and then he returned to scrubbing away. He was nearly done, and after that he would make up some fried eggs for breakfast, and they would see what to do from there.

"Where did you find the soap?" Naruto-chan asked curiously. He was bouncing on his heels eagerly, but his head never came above the edge of the counter.

"There was some in the storage container under the bathroom sink." Konohamaru said, "It was almost empty though, so I had to finish it off. I'm glad your bath area is at least clean." he added with an exasperated tone. _That would take ages to scrub up._

"So that's where I left it!" Naruto said cheerfully.

Konohamaru scrubbed the last of the grime off silently, rinsed the rag as well as he could manage, and turned off the tap.

"...Do you have any pans?" He asked when he had put the rag with the other laundry.

Once Naruto was stuffing bits of fried egg into his mouth eagerly, Konohamaru continued thinking about what he ought to do that day. _I need to see about finding a job, _he thought, _ getting some laundry done if I can, maybe finding myself a change of clothes. Aaaahh what else?_

He looked at Naruto choking down a huge hunk of his breakfast and thought of something. _It could end up being risky, but it's worth a try..._ "Say Naruto-chan!" he quipped.

Naruto looked up at him and swallowed abruptly.

"About this ojiji you mentioned last night. Who's that?" he put up an innocent and curious tone.

"That's the Third Hokage." Naruto said, "He checks on me every month and brings my grocery money so I can get food. And he pays my rent."

"You call the Hokage ojiji?"

Naruto fell for the fake astonishment. "W-well it's 'cause I _like_ him! He's nice to me!" the underfed boy protested, "I'm not being disrespec'ful!"

Konohamaru made a hum sound and took another bite of his own breafast before he went on. "Then..." he began, "Why don't we go visit Hokage-sama today?" he suggested calmly, "So he knows I'm taking care of you."

Naruto looked confused, but he didn't seem opposed to the idea. After all, they were visiting Sarutobi, who was the closest thing to family or friend he'd had before 'Kazuya' had come along. He nodded and started on his second egg.

"Then we'll leave after breakfast."

78()78()78()78()

Konohamaru stubbornly held onto Naruto's small hand as he strode through the main roads of the village. He could feel the looks he was getting: shock, astonishment, disgust. He was sure Naruto was getting even worse looks, and for that reason he refused to let go. The younger boy was skipping along at his side with a pretense of happiness, and Konohamaru honestly wasn't certain whether it really was a false pretense or not. Nonetheless he remained worried.

Naruto's apartment complex was a good half hour walk from the Hokage Mansion, which in additon to being the Hokage's residence, was also the mission handling center, the conference center, diplomatic hub- it also inteconnected with the jounin and ANBU general headquarters. On a basic level, it was just the Village Center with the Hokage Residence built into it.

There were swarms of chuunin and jounin there right now, probably present for mission briefings, or to pick up squads to head out on missons, or even to hand in mission reports for processing and review. Konohamaru remembered how 'tedious' Ebisu-sensei had referred to post-mission paperwork being. He wondered if it was true sometimes, since his cell leader was -admittedly- a bit of a whiner.

The most expedient way to reach the Hokage's office after his grandfather had passed was to forgoe passing the receptionist at the front desk and take the side stairs that wound around the outside of the building and stopped at the floor the office was on- after that, you could ignore the guards stationed outside (usually staying out of sight as they were ANBU) and simply knock. If you were given a go-ahead, you could enter. Before his grandfather had died though, only jounin rank or higher had access to the side stairs, and civilians or lower rank ninja had to pass through the receptionist at the front desk, who would intercom the Hokage directly and let him know the name of the visitor heading upstairs to see him. After that, the stairs would lead to a small waiting room where the Hokage's assistant would eventually usher you in. It was much more tedious and annoying.

Konohamaru decided he would rather go through with the receptionist than being tossed on his rear for a misdemeanor, though.

The receptionist at the desk was still old lady Chinatsu. Konohamaru had never known her last name, but she had retired just shortly before the chuunin exams in which the Sandaime was killed, replaced by a diligent and formal younger male named Tetsuo, or Terumi something.

He ignored the sudden freeze of activity upon his entering. He ignored the stares and the murmurs. He ignored the spike in chakra and killing intent. And he walked right up to the reception desk.

"Good day." he said politely, keeping his grip on Naruto-chan's hand secure.

Old lady Chinatsu adjusted her glasses and looked down at him through her laugh-line wrinkled eyes. "Good day." she replied stiffly. She had also seen Naruto-nii...Naruto-chan.

"Is Hokage-sama busy at the present time? I have an important matter to discuss with him. My name is Katsuragi Kazuya."

Chinatsu was silent for a long moment. She seemed to be debating whether to coldly turn the two boys away or let them through. Finally she pressed the button on her old intercom.

"Hokage-sama." she rattled, "A 'Katsuragi-kun' is here with the de- with Uzumaki-kun to see you. He says the matter is important."

When his grandfather's voice buzzed back over the radio system, Konohamaru took in a sharp breath and forced himself not to grow hot and cry helplessly. He hadn't heard the voice in years, and it was still the same kind, patient sound it had always been. He found himself hoping he wouldn't have to deal with it too often. He also realized he would have to steel his nerves before his actually saw his grandfather, or he would lose it and blow his cover. Then it would all be over, and who knew what would happen after that.

"Please send the both of them up, Chinatsu-san. I'm not busy, so they can go right through the waiting area."

"Understood, Hokage-sama." Chinatsu replied. She looked pointedly at Konohamaru. "I assume you heard all that. I do hope you are serious about this urgent matter of yours. It wont' do to waste the Hokage's time."

"Yes, ma'am." Konohamaru returned obediently, and he pulled Naruto up the stairs with him.

The two ANBU guards were not hiding themselves from sight or sense when Konohamaru and Naruto arrived. They were in plain view, rigid and ready to pounce at any moment. The black haired boy was deeply unnerved. On the right, a wolf mask, on the left a boar.

"Step through, Katsuragi-Kazuya." The boar spoke tonelessly.

Konohamaru swallowed. He had never been able to deal with the black ops people. They were just too _creepy_, too ready to slit throats or turn on you in your sleep or say something morbid. Kakashi-sensei and Sai were okay, but even they still had their moments. He opened the door.

Sarutobi Hiruzen was sitting at his desk with his chin in his hands. A common and contemplative pose that almost anyone who had ever had the pleasure to meet him had seen. His hair was already gray and disappearing, his face full of wrinkles, his hat cast aside on the corner of his desk. He looked at Konohamaru directly and calculatingly.

He tapped his chin.

Naruto fidgeted and Konohamaru shifted his weight.

Sarutobi let out a low hum.

Konohamaru waited patiently while he was sized up. He was aware that he couldn't avoid being analyzed because it was just something Sarutobi clansmen _did._ They analyzed every person or creature they met- even his rash uncle Asuma had been like that. The Sarutobi clan was just a clan of thinkers, of tacticians, of clever people. They were considered on the same level as the Nara in some cases. Like his grandfather.

"Good day." the Third Hokage finally uttered.

"G-good day." Konohamaru replied clumsily. "Hokage-sama." he added. It was mostly as an afterthought, because he didn't want to sound like he was speaking to a family member.

"Chinatsu-san, my receptionist, tells me that you, Katsuragi-kun, have an important matter to discuss with me."

Konohamaru took a breath, and proceeded to walk cautiously towards Sarutobi's desk. Naruto was following at the same pace, wisely staying silent but bursting with the urge to talk.

"I do, Hokage-sama."

"Then please," the Hokage gestured to a pair of wooden chairs that had been set out, "Sit and let us discuss."

Naruto scrambled up into one of them, summarily yanking away from Konohamaru's grip. The older boy sat stiffly in the other chair and placed his hands on his knees.

"Er..." he fumbled. _How am I supposed to begin?_ He glanced at Naruto nervously. _I doubt ojiji would have any problems with somebody offering to care for Naruto-nii...er, Naruto-chan, especially if he thinks they can be trusted, but bringing the subject up is proving to be kind of hard..._

Sarutobi sighed. "Well, let us begin with this. How are you acquainted with Naruto-kun, Katsuragi-kun?"

Konohamaru stiffened even more, if that was possible. "I-I...! Er..." he took a deep breath. "That is...we only just met, really."

Sarutobi nodded and gestured for him to continue.

"I've...been living on my own for a while now. I'm an orphan, y'see?" he said. _I'm lying to my own grandpa!_ His mined wailed, _I've become a horrible person! Wait, I've lied to him dozens of times before. ….Even so!_

"And, well, yesterday I kind of took a bad spill and had to get patched up at the hospital. That's kind of beside the point, but I guess I kind of wanted to let you know that my injuries aren't anything to do with Naruto-chan." _though I don't think ojiji really needs any reassurance of that!_

Surprisingly, however, Sarutobi looked relieved to have heard that. "I see." he said softly. Something in Konohamaru suddenly felt afraid of that relief. Why, why was he relieved?

"But anyway, I was broke and wandering around looking for a place to sleep for the night and ended up crashing at Naruto-chan's place somehow, and..."

Naruto finally burst and leaped up in his seat triumphantly, declaring, "Ojiji, Kazuya-oniichan said he's gonna be my big brother! He said it! He promised he'd take care of me and everyhing!"

Sarutobi and Konohamaru gazed in bewilderment in the wake of the child's reckless outburst, watching his chest heave up and down and looking at the joyous expression on his face. Konohamaru slowly turned to his grandfather, and Sarutobi slowly turned to gaze at him again, pensively. Naruto remained standing on his chair all the while.

"So...am I to believe this, that you have offered to become Naruto-kun's caretaker?"

Konohamaru nodded shortly. "Y-yessir. You see, I dont' have any place to stay, and Naruto-chan needs someone to take proper care of him. And he seems like such a good kid, I thought he needed a break so..."

Konohamaru fidgeted briefly, then gave into the urge to pull Naruto back into his seat.

"Anyway, I thought I would get your approval first since it seems like you kind of take care of him from what he tells me. And I was going to ask if you knew what I could do to find some work or something, since the stipend you give him -he told me about that too- won't be enough to support two of us. I mean, I really don't know where to begin... you know...?"

His voice died down weakly as a slow smile spread across Sarutobi's face. "You are an honest boy, aren't you?" he said admiringly, "I suppose you know exactly who Naruto is, don't you? You ought to be old enough."

Konohamaru looked over at Naruto. He was no longer paying any attention at all. He looked back at Sarutobi and nodded. "I know, but..."

"And why does this not matter to you, Katsuragi-kun?" the Hokage asked. His tone was quite serious.

"I..." Konohamaru tried to form an intelligent response.

People had asked him things like this before. Back when he had found out properly from Naruto-niichan about him being a Jinchuuriki, he had been initially shocked and awed, felt horrible for everything his brother must have gone through earning the village's support...and then he had just gone on as if nothing had happened. He could never come up with anything other than

"Naruto is Naruto..." he mumbled, "And nobody else. That's all I know right now."

The Sandaime looked endlessly pleased.

"Well then." he said, "Naruto-kun."

Naruto turned his attention to the conversation again and cocked his head. He didn't seem to have heard a word they had said. Konohamaru hoped that was really the case.

"From today on I will be increasing your monthly allowance by fifteen percent- don't worry about the math, your brother knows how to do it I'm sure."

Naruto looked incredibly excited, began to bounce up in his chair, and whipped his head to stare at 'Kazuya' adoringly. Sarutobi turned back to Konohamaru again.

"It's too soon to mock up any papers making you Naruto's brother or caretaker in any official means, but until we can make the arrangements, Kazuya-kun, you will continue to live with Naruto and look after him as his roommate."

Konohamaru... 'Kazuya' nodded. "Understood, Hokage-sama."

"As for finding you work, I will have someone look into some things for me, and once we have found something I will have you come and meet with me again. For now..."

The Hokage heaved himself up from his desk and placed a few bills in Konohamaru's hand. "Because you mentioned you were broke, here is some pocket money." The old man winked, "Don't tell anyone, and have a nice day."

Konohamaru crunched the paper money in his hand gratefully. _Ojiji's just as much as a softie as always._

"Thank you very much, sir."

* * *

Ending Notes:

**1. **For the sake of avoiding confusion, let us assume that **one ryo is equal to two dollars.** This is using US currency.

Naruto's monthly stipend was 215 ryo before Sarutobi increased it, so it's exactly 247.25 ryo now.

The amount of 'pocket money' Sarutobi gave Konohamaru was 30 ryo, equal to 60 dollars US cash. Assuming the Hokage has a comfy salary, this really is pocket change to Sarutobi. To Konohamaru, who has been receiving a genin's salary heretofore, it's a nice sum of money.

**2.** Konohamaru is still adjusting to having Naruto be seven years younger than him. Prior to this point, Konohamaru was four years younger, a good head and a half shorter, and lacking in any kind of ability to give Naruto advice. He's suddenly in a position to raise Naruto as a parent or sibling figure now, so part of his trouble making the adjustment is showing in his stumbling between "Naruto-niichan" and "Naruto-chan" when addressing Naruto. Sometimes he forgoes the honorifics entirely, but this usually happens mentally.

Konohamaru is slowly adjusting to his new pseudonym, Katsuragi Kazuya. Occasionally he is referred to as such in the narrative, and eventually he'll be referred to almost exclusively as Kazuya as he begins to think of himself that way.

**3. **For those of you interested, my beta devised a salary system for shinobi. Some missions are paid using an hourly rate, while others are paid with a set price upon completion. A shinobi is paid hourly when carrying out a mission that has a set amount of working time tacked to it. If the working time is not set or known, then the set rank price is used. The higher your shinobi rank, the more you are paid. Here's the genin salary:

**Shinobi Salary Guide For Genin Rank**

**D-Rank Missions:**  
Hourly rate, 3 ryo.  
Set rate, 12 ryo.

**C-Rank Missions:  
**Hourly rate, 5 ryo.  
Set rate, 15 ryo.

**B-Rank and Ascending:  
**Chuunin rate, deduct four ryo.

**Genin are not to be sent on S-Rank missions:** This is a policy put in place just after the Third Shinobi War ended, in an effort to spare the lives of more genin and keep them alive longer. During the Third War, many genin met their deaths because they were set to tasks too dangerous for shinobi of their rank to carry out. Despite this, you often see Naruto out on S-Rank missions, don't you? The assumption (for this story) is that the council makes an acception for him, simply because he is a jinchuuriki. They're a bit petty.

I hope those of you who read this chapter enjoyed it. I'm still working away at the story, so if you'd like to see more, please review! I'd also love to hear constructive criticism and suggestions.


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